"Partners in Parenting" - Lessons for Blended Parenting

Today would have been my parents’ 74th wedding anniversary, and it’s one of those days that pulls at my heart. My mom and dad were married for 65 years—a lifetime that, if you asked them, seemed to pass in the blink of an eye.

Life was busy, with five kids, work, and the usual chaos of family life, yet they somehow stayed deeply connected.

The phrase I use all the time—partners in parenting—comes directly from the example they set for our family.

Our household wasn't perfect, but my parents lived by one simple value:

Family First. You show up for each other. You work through disagreements. And yes, in our Italian/Croatian household with five kids

—four of them girls—we definitely “worked through” disagreements loudly at times!

One of my favorite memories is from the summers. My parents would sit on the front porch with a cup of coffee while we played outside with the neighborhood kids. At the time, it just looked like they were chatting.

Looking back now, I realize something deeper was happening. That was their time to reconnect, catch up on the day, and most likely talk about us kids so they could be on the same page.

Did they have rough patches? Of course. Every marriage does. They were both kind and loving, but each had a bit of a stubborn streak that sometimes led to frustration. We didn’t witness their disagreements, but we did witness the follow-up: “Your mom and I talked about it, and here’s our decision.” Even as kids, we knew they were a team.

Years later, as I began facilitating parenting workshops and coaching couples, I noticed a pattern. Many of the challenges parents brought to me weren’t really about the kids. They usually came down to one of three things:

1. The couple wasn’t aligned in their parenting

2. Communication had broken down

3. They didn’t understand the family dynamics influencing their situation.

And that’s when it clicked for me.

My parents had been modeling the solution all along. They talked things through. They worked as a team. They understood that an argument about forgetting to buy milk was rarely about the milk.

When I started coaching, it wasn’t just because I love teaching—although I truly do. It was because I wanted other families to experience the kind of partnership I grew up watching. I want couples to hear each other, understand their partner’s perspective, and find the middle ground where both voices matter.

I often describe the work I do as "helping couples build an aligned parenting plan." Please understand, alignment doesn’t mean you always agree. It means coming together to make decisions that reflect the vision and values you’ve chosen as the foundation of your family.

Blended families bring their own unique dynamics, but the heart of it is the same: working together, communicating openly, and putting your family first.

Joe and Elaine—the two people who modeled all of this for me—didn’t know they were planting the seeds for the work I get to do today, but their marriage is the foundation of everything I teach about parenting partnerships.

As my parents celebrate their anniversary in heaven, I share this story with you because I want you to experience that same sense of partnership and alignment in your family. You chose this journey to blend with courage, and I feel honored to walk alongside you and shine a light on the path.

Today's Reflection: When was the last time you and your partner intentionally set time aside to get on the same page about something important for your family?

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If you and your partner are in the early stages of blending and would like to ensure you're building a strong parenting partnership, I have several free resources you can download. Click here to check them out!