Conflict Resolution...What are we teaching our kids?


Something has been sitting heavy on my heart and after chatting with a few other parents, I realized I'm not alone. I'm worried about what our kids are seeing.


It began last winter (2020) when all the chatter of covid 19 began. If you listened to the news there were people saying it's a pandemic and others saying it's nothing more than the flu. Time and again, you'd see grown-ups arguing their point of view and placing blame with little time taken for the sake of finding common ground (we are dealing with something that will affect each and every family.).


Add to that the political debates. Snarky comments and half-truths were being thrown around like it was a gathering of middle school mean girls. I remember telling my husband, "This feels so unproductive. Can't any of them state their position without tearing someone else down in the process?"


The summer was filled with grown adults yelling at each other, destroying things, and people justifying poor behavior (on both sides). It happened again a few weeks ago and once again our kids are seeing repeated coverage of adults gathering and destroying things that aren't theirs. All I could think of is, "What are our kids learning?"


As a parenting coach, one of my favorite topics is effective communication. How do we share our thoughts and feelings, how do we listen to someone else's thoughts and feelings and how do we blend things so we have a positive family dynamic?


I think we can all agree that the examples above show we have lost the art of communicating.


The sad part is, we tell our kids to "use kind words" and "try to talk things out" and yet the adults are failing miserably in modeling this! How can we tell our kids to be kind when all they see on social media is the complete opposite being normalized?


I'm sorry if this is coming off preachy, that's not my intent at all. My mom heart hurts for parents who are trying to raise their kids well in a world that feels upside down. My Nana heart hurts that this is the stuff my sweet grandbaby was born into.


So, what can we do to shift the tide?


Well, first of all...